Wednesday, November 18, 2009

odd one out...

"I know I'm kinda the "odd" kid around here & I've accepted that." was a line in an email i got today from one of my coworkers. i don't know her very well, but when she replied back to an email i had sent, i felt a strange kinship with her that i never had before.

you see, i've always felt like somewhat of an outsider. because of the situations surrounding my disease and basically just because of the way i'm wired, i've never quite felt comfortable in my own skin around other people. i always feel i don't quite fit. sometimes around even my best friends and family.

i'm an artist...extremely creative, i view the world in pictures and colors...yet unlike many creatives, i long for structure; stability; order. so needless to say, i'm not a perfect fit anywhere...
or so i sometimes think...

my reply to her email went something like this..."you're not odd. you're fun! original is good!" after i hit send, i was struck by another thought...originality is of utmost importance to an artist. original pieces are worth so much more than a print of any painting or photo. artists strive for newness...for their work to be not like anyone else's. we crave originiality.

so where am i going with this?

if originality is so important to a human artist, how much more important is it to God...the ultimate artist? each person is different. not one of us is exactly like any other...even identical twins are super different. i know. i lived with a set for 2 years. :) each of us is an original. His original.

i don't know about you, but that makes me feel less like the odd one out and more like...

the beloved...the sought after...the masterpiece.
and somehow...i fit.

bless the day
this restoration is complete
dirty dusty something must be underneath
so i scrape and i scuff
though it's never quite enough
i'm starting to see me finally

a gallery of paintings new and paintings old
i guess it's no surprise that i'm no michaelangelo
every layer of mine hides a lovely design
it might take a little patience
it might take a little time

but You called me beautiful
when You saw my shame
and You placed me on the wall

You who have begun this work will someday see
a portrait of the holiness you meant for me
so i polish and shine
til it's easier to find even an outline of mine

but you called me beautiful
when You saw my shame
and You placed me on the wall
and You placed me on the wall

--anyway, nichole nordeman