i'm not sure how to put it all on paper...er...online. some things i definitely don't want to share at all, and others are just too jumbled up right now to explain.
i'm not sleeping...and when i do sleep, i'm having nightmares...
i'm a little crabby...however doing a very good job of keeping that inside.
i wish the next week would just be over.
you know that feeling when tears are at the back of your eyes, but they just won't spill over?? yeah...got that...
2 tests. 1 week.
in fact, in 3 days, one will be over...in 6, both will be over.
but i just feel like the rest of my life is at stake. i know it's not true. i can wait a year and retest. i can try again...but do i want to do that?? NO WAY!!!
i've been a studying fiend, but this feeling of sure failure is in the back of my mind...taunting. you aren't good enough. you're going to fail. you'll never get those 6 points you need to pass. math and science have NEVER been your strengths. give me spelling, english, reading...i'll ace it every time...but math...science... and i want to be a nurse...who am i kidding??
it sounds as if i've already given up. i assure you i haven't. i've just never worked this hard for anything. never wanted it this bad.
sounds stupid. i know. i'm so tired.